Vulnerable Is the New Strong
There was a point in my life that I whole heartedly believed that strength was the best key attribute that I or any women could possess. For years, I was the strongest woman I knew.
I was (in my mind) making peace with a spirit altering childhood ordeal and at the same time I was smack in the middle of a very toxic and soul stifling relationship.
But nonetheless I was STRONG; I was fine. I didn’t let those things define me. In fact I didn’t speak of them much at all. I was not the result of those things. I was not a victim. And I was also not facing the truth about them either.
I was able to move forward with life in spite of these things and in my mind I was stronger because of them. But no, I was actually not stronger because of them.
Strength at its core, at least for me, was serving as a cloak of self-preservation.
It was a blanket that I hid beneath when I had feelings so raw that I had to protect them from the world for fear of being judged, for fear of not being accepted, or because facing my real emotions was way more difficult than suppressing them and pretending they did not exist.
Strength is not only having been through something and surviving, it is being vulnerable enough to embrace your feelings and own them.
I’ve have realized that vulnerability trumps strength any day. I am stronger now because I finally allowed myself to be vulnerable enough to admit how painful certain things in my life were to me. It is okay to be hurt. It is okay to be affected by painful things.
Vulnerability is good. It is what opens your heart and eventually your mind to new possibilities. When you are closed, you are walking around in armor. Nothing gets in, and that’s the point…BUT…Nothing gets in and that’s the problem. How can you grow and evolve when you are not letting new things into your life?
Vulnerability allows you to love yourself in a way that strength never could.
It allows you to tap into a whole multitude of emotions that are much more fulfilling than strength just for the sake of feeling strong. For me, strong was not real; it was actually my fear of vulnerability in disguise.
When I was able to embrace vulnerability, that is when I found my true strength. So, now I can say I am strong because I have met face to face with those demons of vulnerability. I might even say strong is easy when compared to vulnerable. Vulnerable is just about the hardest thing a person can really do.
But, with every step back to who you really are, the closer you are to finding your voice and living your story.